Business Tech: Corporate Caveman Concussion

"They decided on a tech issue without consulting anyone in the MIS department. Again."

We've had this conversation. We've had it online, in the pages of Spectrum, in the break-room at work… everywhere. The company, or certain people in the company, don't treat us as valuable contributors. We don't get invited to the meetings that change everything about our jobs. When I wonder how long this sort of mess has been going on, I find myself thinking back to the dawn of humanity.

Rock the Dress Code?

Igrocni the caveman is minding his own business, attempting to discover fire, when you appear before him. He greets you with a concussion. Rock meets head. Bang. As you look up bleary-eyed from the ground, you realize that this feels familiar. If he were in a suit, you might have even expected his reaction. We get bonked all the time.

Why? Let's start off with the clothes. He's in a rotting, poorly cleaned, pelt. You are in a shirt with a humorous quote from some movie. That makes you strange. In the corporate world, the T-shirt isn't making you any friends. Try this test: find a co-worker who has a casual work environment — not just for MIS, for everyone — and I'll bet the rank-and-file workers from other departments get along better with the tech workers. Some of the managers may as well, especially if they also dress down. The funny thing is, if they dress up, your dressing up probably won't help.

If I wore a suit as expensive as some of the execs, they'd decide they were overpaying me. If I wear something more, let's say, economical, I'm still not dressing like them. I can often get a better response by wearing a nice button-down shirt and good slacks. It isn't what they are wearing but it is something they would wear. Don't dress for the job you want. Dress adjacent to the job you want. It's less expensive and more likely to make you stand out in an acceptable way.

There is an exception to dressing toward the norm. If you think you can pull off Great Wizard, then dressing differently works. There's a mystique created by "dresses like that and they still accept him. He must be really good." Just remember that some people rage against mages.

Also, bear in mind that everything I just mentioned is much harder if you are female. The number of clothing options, and the number of negative opinions you face, are higher. Note to the men: Women do have it harder. This is just one example. However much you are judged, it isn't a patch on what they go through from both male and female co-workers.

Oooga Booga

The second reason you got bonked is because you don't talk like them. You talk about file-resizing and Igrocni shouts "Oooga Booga" in frustration. As with the cave, so with the boardroom. I've seen this misrepresented by people in MIS as "we are more analytic." No. Just stop doing that. Please. It may be true here and there, but it is less true than you think. They are differently analytic.

Rocco in marketing may not understand why requesting a five hundred page report creates load on the machine. He may not grasp why running the report midday yields smaller numbers than running it at night. That sounds stupid to you. It should. Likewise, he can track fifteen marketing code embeds in his head, taking their penetration, use, and buy-a-longs into account. Rocco has no idea why you can't. You're supposed to be the smart ones.

When I explain to Pat in accounting why the quarter-fiscal report will always mismatch the P&L, I get a glaze-eyed response. However, she can do amortization calculations in her head. Jack in shipping has every baseball stat for his favorite team memorized and can make an argument for his ranked-order analysis of all the pitchers. Nora can glance at a crafting project and never have to look again. That girl who looks like she's spacing out in the art department? She's coordinating color palettes in her head, watching for clashes and reading the emotional temperature of the result. Everyone has a focus — work or play — that may well match or exceed yours. You are better at what you are focused on. They are better at what they focus on. There is no guarantee that you are smarter or more analytic than they are.

The Best Cave

Odds are, you didn't spend last Tuesday morning defending a mud puddle from three aggressive goats. Igrocni did. What you do and where you go may also separate you from the others. In my current job (one of them) we have a lunchtime gaming group. Often, I see someone watching and realize that they are impressed that we have the nerve to play a game in "public." Regardless of their department or station, the idea of being open about a difference is often considered brave or arrogant. Interestingly, we get people from different departments and different ranks - this isn't just an IT (geek) activity. Gaming, for this subset of people, cuts across those things. I could say the same things if we ran a book club at lunch or a knitting circle.

My lack of sports knowledge and my not being a smoker excludes me from being one of "us" to certain people. Where I live and where I shop can also knock me out of the in-crowd. I still remember a co-worker from thirty-plus years ago listening to a conversation about the nascent of world home computers. She looked at the three of us who were comparing observations about the Timex Sinclair vs. the Commodore VIC-20 and said, "Is it me or is it you? When I go home, I read fashion magazines. I go to the theater. The last thing I want to do with my free time is the same thing I do in my professional life." And she was in our department. Imagine how we look to those who are further out from what we do.

Bad Weed

When our caveman hunts, he lays flat and peeks through the tall grass. He is literally in the weeds. As technical people we live in the weedy world of details. Most of our co-workers see "being in the weeds" as slang for lost or confused. They like the ten-thousand-foot view. They want the high-level briefing. Of course, that leads to follow-up questions, which brings the conversation back into the weeds. We get frustrated because it would have been easier for us to just discuss the weeds. That's our perspective. They get frustrated because a supposedly simple question yields a — to them — crazy answer which turns into an eight hour discourse.

So, weeds bad. I'll try to remember that. Except the answer, my friend, is buried in the weeds. The answer is buried in the weeds. Worse, the questions we need to ask in order to finish/fix/find the issue requires answers that require an understanding of the details. I've developed a way to ease people into that. I say, "the short answer is No. The long answer may lead to a Yes. Do you want the long answer?" I get a lot of yeses.

The Other Reason

We don't just get a concussive welcome because we talk, dress, and focus differently. We get bonked because poor Igrocni has had other visitors before. He's learned to bonk first and ask questions later. Remember that the way your co-workers often react to you is because of their previous experiences. I've been yelled at for decisions made by people who left before I got to the company. Transference is not uncommon.

Do I still wear funny shirts? On Fridays I do. High-end slacks? Only when I must. No one is telling you to change. Just understand that our choices are choices and they come at a price.

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Nov/Dec 2016